Where to begin? I've been going through the motions lately and I started to ask myself why and then I realized that next week marks 6 years since my father passed away. Just like clockwork, it's as if my body and mind automatically reacts to it. I can't even believe that it's been 6 years already. It's almost as if time has stood still and sped up all at once. I am not going to get into all of this right now since next week I would love to do another tribute post to my father. It just doesn't feel right for me not to. But the point in me bringing this up today is that it made me understand why I've been feeling a certain way. I noticed myself getting super stressed and upset about almost everything and being overly sensitive. I've been on edge with the littlest things setting me off. I've been forming tears more than usual and overall just not feeling like myself. I noticed a lack of motivation. I always try to fight it and bury it deep down inside, but there are times when I do have to face it head on and accept the way that I feel. This will forever be a part of me and regardless of how much time has passed, I will always have moments like this. I don't think the grieving process ever really goes away completely. It's still there lingering, even after all of these years.
All of this got me thinking about how each and every one of us has so much going on beneath the surface and beyond the pretty/staged photos that we post. We all have a story, a struggle, a challenge and an insecurity. Not everyone is willing to talk about it though and understandably so. Putting yourself out there in such a personal way leaves you extremely vulnerable, especially when you write about it on the internet. You never know how your words will be perceived. Whenever I dig deep, my goal and hope is that my story will resonate with at least one person. I know that there are others out there who have gone through the things I've experienced and feel the same ways that I do. Why not form that connection and reassure someone out there that they are not alone in what they are going through? I think this can be such a beautiful and powerful thing and it's my favorite part about blogging. I notice that when I get personal on social media, most people don't even read my captions. They're just so focused on the photo and their comments reflect the image, not the words. But here on the blog, my Life Chats, travel stories and any other personal things that I share seem to do the best. I love that you guys take the time to actually read what I have to say and to leave comments with your own personal struggles and stories. It's important to start a conversation that matters. I love you for that, so much.
There's been a lot going on with me lately, both work wise and personally. I notice myself feeling so overwhelmed. This weekend I am going to do my best to take a step back from it and just BE. I have so many upcoming things in store that I look forward to sharing with all of you over these next few months. I am also trying to plan one more trip in November for my birthday. Hopefully I can make that work. I love sharing my travel experiences with you guys, especially on snapchat! Love my snapchat fam. I feel like I am going to have a lot to talk about next week, so let me end this here. Thanks for stopping by and wish you a happy weekend. <3
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